One reason I feel women age faster than men is because they open up themselves to a lot of insecurities that shouldn’t be. As a woman you have to understand that it’s not OK for your troubles or challenges to be bigger than you or else it will weigh you down, depress you, turn you into the shadow of yourself and if you’re not careful you might find yourself writing a suicide note and letting go of life.
What do you think is a woman’s deepest foundation of a Happy Life? I noticed that most women daydreamed of the Cinderella experience as kids, getting married to one prince charming even before their minds mature to the reality that School comes first, they need a degree, BSc then MSc and maybe a PhD. The end result of everything a woman wants to be is for her to find a good man to love her perfectly. When I was a teenager, Nineteen years old, I can remember having this sixteen year old female friend that had a well planned idea of how her wedding day would be, She had a mental sketch of the kind of husband she desired, but guess what? As at then if you bring up topics of her future ambitions like Career, how far she wanted to go in her education and so on, this girl barely had a clear idea of what she wanted to do with that part of her life. After all said and done, Do women really find that kind of man that they have always dreamt about later on in life?
Alright, this is where the real discussion starts, My answer is No! Most of them don’t. Yes, Love comes by, but the problem originates when the woman realizes that Loyalty is far off from her relationship. Love becomes worthless to a woman when the man is not Loyal. Mind you, women are possessive beings, so if there is no assurance that you belong to them completely then everything goes wrong. These days, especially in Liberia, women also tend to find comfort in cheating too. Some of them even do it in a shameless way just because they want to get the man’s attention and get back at him. Women! Don’t fool yourself, Cheating on a man as a payback is not strong enough to get is attention, you’re only giving him a good excuse to say that you’ve always been on the streets, at this point your man will play the victim because he would give everyone the picture that he is cheating on you because you’re wild and useless.
OK, Let’s now come to this, How do you keep a happy love life with a cheating boyfriend or husband? These few days the internet has been very active with stories of women murdering their husband’s or boyfriend’s because of cheating. Number one rule, you have no right to go through his phone without his permission. Men will always be men and not just that, because you’re in a relationship with someone doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t understand that they are some areas that you shouldn’t trespass. If a man feels that you respect his privacy he would do all in his power not to rub his mess on your face, every other woman he dedicates his time and resources to will see that your man respects his home, she wouldn’t call him at ungodly hours, She wouldn’t be bold enough to flaunt your man in public because your silence has made you unpredictable, She doesn’t know how bad it would be for her if you ever find out or catch her with your man.
Secondly, Care about him but learn to do without him, don’t be so addictive because that’s when men just feel that they can always do whatever or treat you anyhow. I can’t forget a neighbor I had few years ago, this guy was fond of coming back home by 4am and sometimes 5am in the morning, after roaming the streets from different drinking spots to various girlfriends and so on. His main girlfriend was fond of always begging him and crying every day that he shouldn’t leave home to go and do crazy things on the streets. It got to a point that she got tired, started focusing her energy and time on the kids and the small scale business she had. The next thing that happened is that the man developed a negative attitude against her, his issue was that she doesn’t care about him no more. His girlfriend was surprise, because she knows that she’s doing everything right as his woman, then he bursted out and said she stopped caring for him the moment she stopped crying and begging him not to go out to other women. So this guy enjoyed the way his partner was dying slowly everyday grieving on his bad behavior? To him it was an act of Love. As a woman, you shouldn’t let your boyfriend or husband cheating habit bother you, instead use that time to step up your life, be more creative and purposeful in your life. Look good! Let your records be clean, he shouldn’t be able to accuse you that you’re cheating too! Show him that he is becoming less relevant in your life.
Men have big ego’s they hate it when a woman puts them on that kind of challenge. Trust me, he wouldn’t know when he will be doing everything to meet up with your standards. Then if he decides to be a stone heart and refuse to grow or realize that his loyalty is to only you, One thing you will love about the new you is that you’ve nurtured and raised a better woman out of yourself, You’re no longer that woman that would be useless and helpless because a man can’t love her the way she wants. Your New strength would make you walk away without looking back or having fears that you will have regrets. A man who knows the worth of a Loyal and respectful woman would definitely come your way because the Law of attraction and the grace of God doesn’t disappoint.
Written by: @iam_elicjaleiba
Featured model: Josephus Blah